Monday, January 4, 2010
a truly idealistic love story is one that should never happen in real life.
then there's an aspect which i begun to think about... that when one loves another, one is essentially only loving that person in his/her mind. the projection which one has made of the other person based on their past memories shared or, the imagined possibilites to be shared with that person. i.e. no one actually love another person for who that person really is - one only love that person for who one thinks he/she is... when the image fits in with one's hidden or sub-conscious idealism, voila! love sparks fly. this itself is explained in the theory that without love, there will be no disappointment.
see, disappointment only arises if one has expectations of another in the first place. if you truly love another person no matter who he or she is, then why would one have any expectations of him/her in the first place? it is because one is in love with one's imagination of that person, that's why disappointment occurs. one is disappointed at the fact that love, however idealistic one wishes it to be, is still grounded in reality.
the only mysterious component in love is the ability to feel deeper and more intense the emotions of that someone. without this empathising ability in one, there would hardly be any love to speak of. perhaps, we love so as to minimise the other negative emotions that arise if we did not love. so essentially we love others because we love ourselves, no? we make choices that might hurt us so people we love might be happy, and we call this sacrifice. but could it also be that if we did not make these choices, we are still hurt by the fact that people whom we truly love will not be happy? thus, "irrational" decisions we make can also be logical in this way.
complications in love only come in when we happen to love more than one person, presenting us with some conflicting choices to make. complications also arise when infinite future possibilities are projected differently between different people, of different people. see why loving a person who is unformed, like a child is so much easier as compared to loving someone who is fixed and formed and vastly different from what we hope he/she would have been like.
as long as one feels the depth of another's joy and pain beyond his/her comprehension, one is already in love.
Posted by a fish that dreamt a world away at 5:01 PM