"i'll like a drop of rainwater refracting light...
and a dash of illumination across the endless dark too."

Saturday, January 23, 2010

be reasonable. because this is not an excuse.

recently fish is simply tired of trying to discuss things peacefully and amiably, tired of her constantly listening attitude and never-being-heard moments. she is tired of people's rude and disrespecting attitudes and detests getting into "self-assumed conversations" with those who only wanted themselves to be heard. she even lost track of the number of times when she felt like ending such "conversations" there and then, the countless times where she just wanted to tell these people: hey, you might as well just go talk to a mirror or a wall, since they would be ever patiently listening, and never give their opinions in exchange at all, and guess what? you simply don't have to talk to me you know? what we are having here is a one-sided conversation, so why not let's simply end it earlier.

people like to use 'excuses' to convince others, and 'reasons' to convince oneself.
yet essentially, excuses and reasons are all but subjective, defined differently by different people.

nonetheless, at the end of the day, all of us just want to be in a good light, appear responsible, that "we had no other choice" and blameless. fish personally feels however, that this should be left for others to decide for themselves, and not using one's utmost efforts to carefully select certain information to portray oneself in a nice light. for if these people are reasonable, they would neither judge nor be easily taken over by one's incessant insistence. they would be objective in their observations and not see through clouded spectacles. and if they are unreasonable, then to fish, their opinion simply does not matter one bit, period.

"i had no choice since everyone else is doing that." personally, fish firmly and strongly believes and classifies this as an excuse. if you truly detest what others are doing, and allow your very self to do the very same thing unto others, then stop trying so hard to give an excuse so as to see yourself in the light you want. you are but one of them, period.

here's something fish can never stand. overly self-absorbed in "being right" attitude and refusal to hear what others have to say before one gives his or her own judgement. if one firmly believes one is right, then shouldn't he or she have even more patience, composure and grace to hear what the other party has to say first, before incessantly insisting that one's argument is faultless? wouldn't it be easier to convince the others if you first understand the thinking trend they got themselves into and then steer them thereafter?

IT IS OUTRIGHT IRRITATING when fish waits for the person to finish saying what he or she is trying to say and then tries to tell him or her what she thinks and then the person just cuts in before fish finishes, or worse, doesn't even try feebly to let her begin her points. for even the most aggressive debating competitions allow both parties the right to speak, hence to fish, this is outright inconsiderate, rude and uncivilised. and she automatically places that person under her category of "people whom she'll never strike a sincere conversation with or talk to, on her own accord if she has a choice".

to fish, the logic, value and purpose of a conversation is this: she enjoys knowing your opinions, trend of thoughts and feelings on certain matter, and she is hoping to open herself to more views and perspectives which might never have occurred to her before, but at the same time as she is learning all these, if you don't even try feebly to listen, then it is to be considered that a fair exchange of ideas has never taken place, for it is simply a presentation by a presenter, but never a conversation. the soul and heart of a conversation lies in its engagement of the minds, thoughts and ideas of BOTH parties, as it is the case for hands to clap.